Today I Learned to Hate (And Then Live Again)
by Ai-Chan
Summary: Pretty much an Inu past story- rated PG13 for blood and cussing. Sorry for the bad summary!


~*DISCLAIMER*~  
  
I don't own ANYTHING of Rumiko Takahashi's work.... "InuYasha", although I wish I did!!! Please don't sue meee!!!  
  
*********THIS CONTAINS SPOILERS!!! I WARNED YOU!!!**************  
  
Today I Learned to Hate (And Then Live Again)  
  
By: Ai-Chan (Chibiaichan@cs.com)  
  
A wail echoed in the room, as the woman had given her last bit of strength. The room was then silent, except for the cry of the newborn. Quickly the babe was delivered to his mother, into her eager arms. Tears streamed down her reddened face, as she held him close to her, whispering to him. A man that stood beside her bedside, leaned towards his new son. Tenderly he touched his head, his thin white hair, and his tiny little pointed ears. He then moved his hand up to his mate's face, rubbing away her tears with his large thumb.  
  
"He is strong.. like you." She whispered to him, her blue eyes looking up to him with deep pride. The baby had now stopped whining, now just squirming in his mother's grasp.  
  
"And he is handsome as you are beautiful." He told her back, leaning to her ear.  
  
A creak of the door was heard, and then light footsteps, as a young man entered the room. "Father, you have called?" He asked, in his proud voice. He paused, upon seeing his mate, and the bundle in her arms. He did a quick bow before them, so not to be scorned by his father. "Lady Yume." He greeted.  
  
Grinning, the Demon Lord motioned for his eldest son to come toward them. "Shesshomaru, come meet your younger brother." When his son was close enough, he took hold of his arm, pulling him even closer. "Here, Yume, give him to me." Into his father's arm, to Shesshomaru's.  
  
Shesshomaru stared at him, emotionless. His eyes rose as his father again began to speak.  
  
"Shesshomaru, have you any ideas for his name?"  
  
Again, another pause. What did he care about this little whelp's name?! "Uhm-" He choked, handing back the child as quick as he had been placed into his own arms. "I am not much for naming children."  
  
Father laughed at his son. "That is fine, but I thought that you may have had a deeper bond of brother's if you were the one to name him." He then sighed, looking to his wife, and then new child. "He is far too innocent for a true demon name, but still, he needs a strong name. One that people will remember." He paused again, another smile spreading across his wide face. "InuYasha will be his name."  
  
"Inu..Yasha?" Whispered Mother, staring to her newborn. "It suits him."  
  
Meanwhile, Shesshomaru was a bit overwhelmed by all of these happenings. Him, bonding with this.... Half-breed?! His father had softened, as he had stayed with this human! He couldn't have been in his right mind! When him and his mother were still mates, they had protected these lands with the youkai pride he remembered. Now his mother wouldn't have anything to do with his father, yet she was determined this woman was simply a fling, a wench, a hobby. He would realized his mistake, his mother had told him several times.  
  
"Son!" Called his father again, his eyes narrowing. "Where are you son?!"  
  
Shesshomaru snapped to attention, as he heard his father's voice. "Yes father, I'm sorry. Nice name." Quickly, he bowed. "But I must depart, mother has need of my presence." Again he bowed, backing away. "Thank you, Father." With a glare to his new mate and son, he was gone from the room, shutting the door lighter then he had hoped. His knuckles were white, both hands in fists. When he entered his own room, just on the other side of the large castle like cave, he punched his wall. Blood poured out his broken skin, he didn't really mind too much. His wounds would heal within a few moments, unlike the one that pierced his intermost feelings and thoughts.....  
  
"Please! Let us live!" Screamed Yume, clutching her toddler in her bloody arms. "If not me, then let your Lord's son live!"  
  
The young man's eyes glowed. His anger was at it's peek, as he was about to answer the woman. He was rudely interrupted.  
  
"Young Lord, let us stop this!" Screamed one youkai, parading into the room. "Would your Father not be disgusted by this primitive behavior?!"  
  
Shesshomaru turned from the woman to snarl at the new comer, but then stopped at his sight. "Uncle of the Southern Lands!" He barked, breaking into a deep bow.  
  
Another woman, a youkai, stepped up from the back of the group. "Brother." She greeted, bowing also. "We have not met in a long while." Pushing back her long, wavy strands of white hair, she stared at him with cold, yellow eyes. She then strode beside her son, to look at the cowering woman and child. The child now screaming, and snuggling to his mother's breast. "Because the Lord of the South wishes, we shall let you live." She snarled. "But since our Lord of the West no longer lives, you are forbidden to return. The mistakes of an ignorant child can be ignored, for now."  
  
The human woman stood shakily to her feet, surrounded by ragged, bloodied layers of her once beautiful kimono. She held her child securely to her, as she stared at the group with hard eyes. No longer did fear hold her back. Slowly she backed away, not once turning her back from them. Once her back was turned, she was not sure if they would strike. With the screaming child, she left the room, now running. She would leave quick now, sure never to return. She was sure she could live in peace, some how.  
  
"Why can't I stay up mother...?"  
  
"You have already stayed up half past what you normally do....."  
  
"Please............"  
  
This scenario went on night after night. The room was dimly lit, only by three candles that were place around the small room of the hut. In the middle of this room sat a young woman. Her raven locks surrounded her, blanketing the small boy that adorned her tiny lap. The boy looked up adoringly at her, with big, round golden eyes.  
  
"InuChan, you'll be sleepy tomorrow...." Persisted mother, narrowing her sea blue eyes.  
  
"Just one more story..... please mother!" Continued to beg the little boy.  
  
A sigh left her lips, but quickly turned into a smile. "One more" She finally agreed, wrapping her slender arms around her little one lovingly. "But right after, we must sleep. Mother is very tired." Her fingers delicately rubbed her his pointed, white ears.  
  
"I promise!" He shouted happily, snuggling into her arms as she messaged his ears. This always had a way of making him so sleepy... a yawn escaped his tiny lips. "W-What story will it be.. mother..?" He whispered, now in a more drowsy voice as his small body was becoming very limp in her lap.  
  
"This story takes place many years ago.... Where a Priestess worked very diligently at her shrine-"  
  
But poor little InuChan never heard the rest, as he was already far away, in his dreamland.  
  
Mother giggled as soon as she realized this, pulling him into her arms and landing a kiss upon his forehead. "Goodnight, my InuYasha, sweet dreams....."  
  
The ball rolled soundlessly across the grass, as it brushed against the young ones bare foot, landing at his ankle. He blinked, at the unexpected surprise. Bending down, he effortlessly lifted the ball, then looking up to where it originated. "Is this yours...?" His voice squeaked shyly at the strangers. His eyes were full of innocence, as an older man stared at the boy as if he came from the pits of Hell. He stood behind from the boys, who had about the same expression.  
  
"Papa, is that what you call a.... youkai? Aren't those from fairy tales?" Asked one boy, looking up to the man with a look of question on his face.  
  
The man's face hardened with his son's question. "Son, they are real." He answered sternly. "And you mustn't go near them, they are evil creatures." The man continued to stare. "But he isn't a youkai."  
  
"Oh?" Asked the older boy. "But he has funny looking ears-" He placed his hands on his head, pointing up his fingers like the accused ears. "Those aren't human, and those eyes look funny as well!" He now pointed an extended finger to the little one across from him, as if he were a side show freak.  
  
"No, of course he isn't human." The man then stated in a, as-matter- of-factly way. "Although, he may be half- he is a hanyou."  
  
"Hanyou?" They said in unison, clearly confused at this new revelation. Finally, the older one spoke. "A half demon, are you meaning to tell me he's trying to fit in with US?!"  
  
The boy, with the pointed white ears that were now flat against his head, and the yellow eyes that were now narrowed with a mix of confusion, anger, and sadness backed away slowly, still clenching the ball tightly with his clawed hands.  
  
"Well, he still has my ball." Then stated the younger boy, with his arms crossed with child stubbornness.  
  
"You can have it!" Cracked the little hanyou's voice, as he threw the ball in their direction, only to have it flung back in his own direction. His teeth clenched at this situation.  
  
"We needn't things that are infected with your kind! Get out of our town!" Growled the man, before taking his boys by their arms and turning away, as the ball harmlessly once again slid past his ankles. From the distance they were, the little hanyou clearly heard the words of the father: "No need for tears son, we can buy a new one!"  
  
Spinning on his heels, and tears burning in his eyes he was off. He couldn't stand it! Why couldn't he play? He had only been standing there, what was so wrong with him? His blurry vision found his mother, as he ran into her embrace. His innocent face then looked up to her. "Whats..... a hanyou?"  
  
Tears welled into her own eyes as the words uttered past her son's lips. All she could do was hold him...... because how would she tell her little one... No, today it could wait. Another day she would reveal, but not today. Bending to his height, she held him, as he laid his head upon her shoulder, she could feel his warm tears soak through the layers of the kimono she wore. She knew what was to be fact... That he already knew his differences.  
  
"No way!" He said, running from her. "I'm not tired, not at all!"  
  
She let out a laugh, still knelt to the little ones height. "I believe you."  
  
InuYasha paused for a moment, letting out his own childish giggle. "Okay mother, now will you play a game with me?"He ran to her then, giving a jump when he reached her.  
  
Mother leaned her elbows on her knees, using her hands to support her chin as she listened. She simply nodded at his request, watching his face brighten as she gave his desired reaction.  
  
"Okay, were going to play hide n' go seek, k? You be the finder, I'm going to go hide!!! Hurry and cover your eyes!" Without even waiting for a response, he was off in his mad dash for a place to hide.  
  
"No farther then the big tree in the front of the house!" Called out Mother, as she covered her eyes and began counting, and her mind beginning to drift. It hadn't been two years since she had left the grand home they had once lived. They had lived in a wonderful place, where servants served them, and her mate lived.... And their son was tucked away from all the evils of the world. But by cruel fate everything had shattered in what seemed like an instant... Oh, counted to one-hundred, better go find him!  
  
InuYasha crouched in the tall grass, behind a thick trunk. It was just past the big tree, but he figured his mother wouldn't mind too much. He knew the forest could be dangerous come night, but he knew if need be he could protect them. Like mother always told him, he was man of the house. A smirked crawled across his face as he thought about his hiding spot. Mother was smart, but she would never think to find him in such an obvious spot! She knew her pup was far too intelligent to think of such a thing! That's when he heard the moving of grass. He crouched farther, even moving closer to the tree. His mother couldn't have found him so quickly, could she? Oh no.. at this rate he would be found for sure!  
  
The figure pushed aside the grass, making their way through. It wasn't far before reaching the target now.  
  
He knew that mother was close now, his little body made itself into a ball. He closed his eyes and covered his face with his hands, knowing the surprise he would feel when his mother would tag him and his game would be over with. And now he knew that mother had to be over him, somehow feeling the shadow against the moon touch him... As he felt the light touch he opened his eyes..  
  
Mother searched, but InuYasha seemed to be no where in sight. "That boy, he doesn't follow directions well...." She grumbled, but continued to smile, knowing he was only a child. Children got into trouble, that was a way for them to understand and learn. Well, this only met she would have to go a little past the large tree in order to find her disobedient son. A movement came from the corner of her eye, and she unintentually let out a giggle. How careless he was being, which she very much expected. She found herself nearly jogging to his hiding spot. Not only did she want to find him for the games sake, she also wanted to find him because of the danger that was involved now with the game. As she neared the tree, she slowed, making her voice loud enough for him to hear. "Oh, where could my baby boy be?" She smiled broadly, nearly around the tree. "Oh no, could I have lost him forever...?" She then peeked around the tree..  
  
"Mother!" Cried out the pup, reaching out for her, but unable to actually make the contact.  
  
Her eyes were wide, as her shaking hands covered her mouth. "L-Lord Shesshomaru!" She uttered in disbelief. There, before her was her child, tied by the hands by a simple rope. Not only that, but he was hanging from the tree by his wrists. "Let him go!" She growled.  
  
Shesshomaru kept his neutral expression, as his toad of a servant smiled snidely. "Lady Yume." He greeted her back, mockingly. The toad swung his staff about, waddling over to the woman, before Shesshomaru let out a deep growl. "Jaken, care to the boy!" Lowering his head, the toad did as he was told, rushing over to the now whimpering InuYasha.  
  
His mother's eyes furrowed, as she stood, nearly helpless. Finally, a simple question spilt from her near perfect lips "Why..? We left your lands, did we not?!"  
  
A sneer marked on the youkai's face, as he looked away for a moment, only to return his gaze with a burning hatred. "You brought something that should have never been in this world- furthermore affairs with my father! Of all people!" He need not move, because his movement wouldn't increase the fear the woman felt, it was already far too great. Although, the fear was not for herself. His eyes nearly glowed as he spoke more. "You need not hear the rest! I don't have to say a word to you! Father is dead, there is no need for me to heed to his silly request!" He placed up his hand to Jaken, the toad then raising his staff high.  
  
Before anything could be done, Mother's voice shouted. "Stop! Do you hate me so much?!"  
  
His eyes narrowed, as he let out a snarl and turned away. "Nevermind you!" He pushed away Jaken, walking past him and grabbing the little hanyou just as he was about to set himself free from his primitive holdings. Instead, the youkai had him by his slim neck. "There is no pain like a mother's pain for her young, correct?"  
  
"Shesshomaru!" Then cried Yume, hands clenched in fists on each side of her slender body. "Release my son! Your father would not approve of such behavior!"  
  
His eyes glared back at her. "Woman, you do not know my father as you would think you do." He squeezed his hand tighter around InuYasha's small throat, his attention back to him. "Brother, now is the time you leave. You were a mistake, I'm sure father realized this, though far too late. I shall correct his error." He brought up his hand, claws ready to strike. "Die!" With that, his claws blurred with the speed in which he struck.  
  
InuYasha shut his eyes tight, feeling the pain as his older brother, again and again struck him with his sharp claws. He heard his mother's cry, as he yelped out in pain. And then he felt himself falling....  
  
Yume's eyes watered as she watched her son's beating. She knew she had to stop it, no matter what the price. Without another thought or concern floating through her mind, she took action. Running, she somehow knocked into Shesshomaru, which didn't do too much of anything except make him angry, but still, she fought, for her son's life. She took hold of the man's wrist, holding them as tight as she possibly could. "I ordered you to release my son!" She cried out, now trying her best just to uncurl his tight grip from his now bruised neck.  
  
"Order, did you say?" Shesshomaru's eyes narrowed at this, his eyebrow slightly raised. The woman's attempts seemed not to phase him in the slightest. "And since when do I take orders from such a lower life such as yourself? I think you misunderstand the happenings in years previous." His gaze turned back to the boy, noise ceasing from his ever moving mouth. "Uninteresting little whelp, away from me." With that, he threw him aside like an old piece of trash. "I was going to have your last vision be that of your son's death, but I don't think he understands entirely. I believe it most justful if he were to see his mother's death, so that I may teach him properly. Since you are a wench of my father's, I will be kind and give you a moderately quick death."  
  
Yume's eye's widened, as she was lifted by her hair entirely from the ground. Her feet dangled helplessly as Shesshomaru with his other hand brought out his sword. Without a single word being spoken, the tip of the sword slid into the woman's chest, and went through her until it reached the hilt. He then dropped her, his eyes watching without the least bit of interest.  
  
InuYasha's tearful eyes had watched on. The small boy could only watch, as his mother was speared. "M-Mother! Mother!" He cried out, as she fell like a ragdoll to the ground. As quickly as he could crawl he was by her side. "Mother, are you okay?" He cried, hugging her.  
  
Her hand swept across his swelled, dirty, blood stained face, as tears stained her own. "My son, don't worry about me. I-I want you to.. run.." She whispered, with all her strength. "My... baby boy...."  
  
"Mother...? Mama? I'm okay!" He insisted desperately, as he shook her a little. It was true, his wounds were healing as they spoke. "Please wake up now!" His voice cracked, tears now flowing like a stream. His head then turned to his elder brother, his eyes lost. "Brother, help her, help her please!"  
  
Jaken was then again by his master's side. Yet again ready to kick the pup while he was down. "Hadn't you noticed, young InuYasha, that it is Lord Shesshomaru's sword through your mother's heart? Or are you yet to realize?"  
  
The young one's once innocent eyes stared up to the two, in silence. Slowly, he turned back to his mother, wiping away his tears. He knew, as the man of the house he couldn't be crying now, he had to be strong! He had to take care of everything. He had to protect mother.... He sat up on his knees, taking hold of the sword and with a grunt pulling it out. Looking at the sword for a moment, he nodded, feeling the fresh, warm blood slip down to his hands and between his fingers. Standing, he picked up the sword with much effort. His eyes now glowed with his newly found hatred, as he charged unwarned.  
  
Shesshomaru was slightly taken back by his little brother's boldness. Not ever had he seen the tyke truly angry. He needn't worry about a blow from the sword, for one, his brother was too light and clumsy for such a weapon. Not to mention, Jaken had already provided a shield with his staff, making the sword fly from InuYasha's grasp. Shesshomaru snarled at Jaken's action, but did nothing about it either.  
  
Surprisingly, the little one wasn't done with his fight, as the sword was stolen from his grasp. He had a second plan that had come by instinctively. His finger's curved, as he jumped up, attacking with his claws. "This is for my mother!" He screamed, reaching out...  
  
Only to get tossed away by Shesshomaru. The youkai looked to him with disgust. "Do you believe a mere HANYOU could even come near to defeating a true youkai, let alone harming?" He then let out a laugh. "Even if we do have the same blood running through our veins, it does not make you and I equals."  
  
The rest of that night had simply been a blurry memory to him. All that he truly remembered was that of his mother, and the remaindered had been left that morning. Slowly, and painfully, InuYasha rose, walking toward the cold, unmoving body of his mother. His eyes didn't seem like his own any longer. His eyes that once held that priceless innocence was now lost to the true fact of the world. He truly did not belong, anywhere. Not even in his own family, or what, which remained. He bent down, touching his mother's face gently. "I'm sorry mother, that I could not protect you, as I was suppose to." He sighed, regrettably, as he turned to begin his long, laborious work.  
  
At the age of five, the small boy had done a remarkably well job for having such small hands. His claws had dug quite a fine hole in the two hours he had worked. However, it had taken another two hours for him to drag his mother into the small grave he had made, and then recover her. In all this hard work not once had he faltered or even stopped for a break of food or drink.  
  
As he finished, a small forearm laid across his forehead, as perspiration trailed down his face. He was under the large tree, but still the day had become quite humid. As he glanced around, he nodded as he noticed what would be perfect. He was back in an instant with his flower, bright and pink, he laid it upon the large dirt heap. With his job finished, he then collapsed beside the grave, not willing to leave Mother's side. Unwillingly, he fell into a sleep...  
  
'Run!'  
  
His eyes opened wide, it was again night. Why was he not listening to mother?! She had not wanted him to lay here and wait for Brother to return! He rose now, with new strength. And with this new strength, he ran.  
  
Tired....  
  
His muscles ached with every leap he made through the uneven woods. His feet were sore, and now even bloodied. He gritted his teeth, he took it... But he had no where to go, no where to sleep.. "M-Mother..." He whispered in a light sob, before collapsing to the ground.  
  
A small girl blinked, as she bent to pick up her next herb. She jumped at the sound from around the large tree. "G-Grandma?" She whispered in a shaky voice, slowly pulling out her bow. She then placed the herbs gently into her pocket, afterwards pushing back a strand of raven hair. Her face turned solemn as she creeped around the tree. Her brown eyes widened, as the object of her worry became known. "A-A boy?" She whispered in her squeak of a voice. Lifting her hakama (which happened to be slightly too large for her tiny form) she rushed to his side. "A-Are you okay?" When there was no response, she knew what she had to do.  
  
The elder woman stretched, as she stood. "Thank you very much for the tea, though you shouldn't have gone through such troubles in your condition."  
  
"It's the least I can do for all you've done for my little girl." The woman replied, rising slowly from her spot as well. "I couldn't teach her the ways now..."  
  
The woman laughed, as she began to make her way to the doorway. "I understand, you need your rest. You make Kikyou happy in so many other ways, including you bringing her new sibling into the world.  
  
Blushing, the woman nodded. "Still, I thank you for everything-"  
  
"Ho? KikyouChan, what have you brought for us today? That does not look like a herb to me..."  
  
"It isn't grandma..." Announced the little girl, dragging the little boy she had found in the woods with all her strength. "Please.. help me, he's hurt!"  
  
Grandma quickly stepped from the door, rushing to help the boy in distress.  
  
Her mother then found her way to the door, as her eyes then widened in surprise. "K-KikyouChan... That isn't a normal little boy!"  
  
A tired giggle left her lips. "I know mama, he has funny ears!"  
  
The little boy with the funny ears laid, in the middle of the tiny home. He hadn't woke yet, but Kikyou's grandma had determined that he was fine, just exhausted. They had laid him near the fire, providing him with bed, and miso soup when he woke.  
  
In the silence, grandma turned to the little girl, who quietly knelt beside the strange boy, tending to his wounds with helpful herbs. "Kikyou.... you are kind, but this kindness will be the death of you someday. Do you understand?"  
  
The little girl was mute for a moment, before turning to her with a giant smile. "Don't worry grandma! Caring for someone never hurt anybody, has it?"  
  
Just as the elder was about to respond to her carefree answer, a light moan was heard coming from the tiny hanyou. Both turned to their patient.  
  
'M-Mother! Mother, where are you-' InuYasha's eyes widened, there was Shesshomaru.. with his sword- "MOTHER!" Choked out the halfbreed, sitting up in his makeshift bed. He then paused, as he quickly noticed his surroundings, and his new scents roaming about... Jumping up from the bed, and spilling the miso in the process, he pounced to the side like a wild animal. A growl escaped his shaking lips, which were equal to his shaking body.  
  
"Ah! The miso I made!" Cried out the little girl with a small pout. "I made that for you..."  
  
InuYasha paused, as he was on all fours. His ears slightly twitched as she talked... Were these people trying to be.... kind?  
  
"Kikyou...." Warned the older woman, placing her arm before the child. "Son, you need not be afraid of us. We are trying to help...."  
  
There was now a sadness in his eyes, and his stomach was twisting in weird ways.... His tummy really hurt... Slowly, he backed away, although that soup looked awfully good.... Even if it was spilt all over the floor.  
  
"Shh... you'll wake up mama too!" Added Kikyou from behind the protecting arm. "Shes sleeping with my baby sister in her tummy!" She stopped speaking when first, grandma placed a hand over her mouth, and two, when the boy began lapping up the soup from the ground.  
  
"There now son... we aren't so scary now, are we?" Whispered grandma, slowly creeping closer. Since he was here, she might as well make friends with him, she figured. Who knows, friends were in all shapes and sizes... Slowly she reached out her hand...  
  
And InuYasha's head flung up, his eyes now focused in the dim light of the room. He growled, now backing away without stopping. His eyes now glowed, he was in the corner, and no one dared to go near. Without warning, he leaped, making the room cry out, and then... he was gone.  
  
Worriedly, grandma's eyes watched as the young half youkai left their presence, as she let out a sigh. It wasn't Kikyou's fault... She had always tried her best to be kind to everything. "Now, little one, do you understand...?"  
  
A laugh now escaped her lips, as her face was full of smiles. "H-He ate my soup, grandma!"  
  
Running... Was that all he could do now a days?! He stopped, when he felt a headache coming on... "I-Its starting!" He cried, as tears began to well. "I-I need mother..." He whispered, hiding behind a tree and holding his head. The headache was gone, but still the change was happening.... And without the usual presence of his mother. His change did happen, however, with mother there or not. And when it was finished, he sobbed, determined not to move. That was, before the weird noises of the forest came.. And he couldn't see as well as he once did. Where was this noise come from... and.... what was around him?!  
  
Well, that decided, he left his spot he was so determined to stay in. His eyes still full of scared tears as he made his way down the dirt road. Still, the very few people who were still awake hardly noticed him. He held his aching tummy... Until he ran into something. Quickly he jumped back, looking quite silly with his teeth bared and no fangs to show for it. He stopped, as it was simply an older woman, who looked down at him heartbroken.  
  
"Oh son, don't you have a place to call home?" She whispered, then bending to his tiny height.  
  
At first, he turned his blue eyes away from her gaze. But as she continued to stare, he was almost forced to look back at her weary brown eyes. "N-Not no more..." He whispered back, his feet slightly squirming at the closeness between them.  
  
Without warning, she gathered him into her large arms. "You poor thing, then you shall come home with me. You'll have a nice hot dinner, and a warm bed to sleep in. Then maybe tomorrow my husband and I can find your family-"  
  
InuYasha squirmed in the hefty woman's grasp. "N-No, please, we can't!!" He cried out, trying to get her to release him.  
  
"O-Oh dear.. is that the case then?" The woman embraced him into a caring hug. "Then you can stay with us if you'd like. But before you make your decision, please come in...?" Setting him down, they had made it to her home. It wasn't much, but it was a roof over his head.  
  
"....k" he answered meekly, walking into the home with caution.  
  
Her skinny husband rose as the young boy walked in, making InuYasha fly backwards with fright. "I'm sorry young man!" Apologized the older man. "My, are you staying with us tonight son?"  
  
"He sure is Pa." Answered the fat woman gleefully. "Why don't you take this younging to get himself a bath, while I heat him up some dinner?" And with that settled, she was off to her hearth, cooking away.  
  
"Why now son, let get all that dirt.. and is that blood? Oh my goodness, we'll, nevermind." He took hold of InuYasha's tiny hand, taking him to the hot tub.  
  
Now clean, warm, and feed, InuYasha was feeling awful sleepy. A little yawn tumbled from his mouth, as he rubbed his eyes, with their drooping eyelids. He snuggled in his covers, his tummy ache some what subsiding. He felt so... wanted here. Somewhere he belonged? And they didn't mind that he was....? Another yawn, and he was out for the count. The two older folks laughing in the background.  
  
"He reminds me of Keyoko, doesn't he Pa..?"  
  
"Sure does Ma... Sure does."  
  
The morning came far too early, probably for all three.  
  
"I'm going to go wake the young one now, is that all right with you Ma?" Asked the elder man, creeping towards the blankets.  
  
"Sure is Pa, breakfast is done!" Called back the elder woman, merrily making away her meal.  
  
Slowly, the man pulled back the covers, to discover the truth... "M- Ma, this is not a normal boy!" he practically yelled across the tiny home.  
  
As Ma looked over, she let out a scream. "It's a youkai, in our home! Of all the dirty tricks it could pull!" She screamed, grabbing her nearby broom and beating the snot out of the blankets.  
  
"E-Eh?!" Cried the tiny hanyou, his eyes widening at his very angry adoptive parents.  
  
Tears fell freely from the old man's eyes, as he took hold of the blankets and pulled them away, throwing them in the fire. "You beast, youkai are not welcome into this home! Have you not terrorized us enough?! Taking our son was not enough?!"  
  
"Out! OUT!" Screamed the woman in panic, hitting InuYasha so much he didn't really have the chance to move even is he wanted her to. "Pa, get your sword! Hurry!"  
  
"S-Sword!" Choked the child, squeezing from the brooms wrath running towards the door, exiting as quickly as he could. "I was wrong!" He screamed, as a new batch of tears left his eyes. "There is no where I could possibly belong...."  
  
That night, he found his new home in a tree. And that was the spot when he heard about the jewel..... Shikon no Tama.  
  
Days, months, years passed, and seasons changed. The young boy once known as a little whelp, had grown, had changed. His face had stayed the same, but was slightly longer. His arms had grown,and his legs, into muscles that carried him where he wanted to go. His eyes had hardened within those years, the once childish innocence that played in his eyes was gone. His senses were at their peek for his age, much better then any normal human could attain. He had learned some tough lessons within his travels. The years had now brought him his teen years, just on the verge of sixteen.  
  
For no particular reason he could figure, he was back. Back to the town that had seemed to have shunned him away those many years before. Still, he stood tall on his branch, ears twitching with the slightest sounds. His arms folded over his chest, looking over the village in a powerful way. A smile found its way across his face, a cold smile. "Its here."  
  
The village news had spread rapidly across the land for a good five years. A jewel lived in this village, it was powerful, and could hunger any youkai's yearning to be stronger. However, for any hanyou, it could bring a sense of hope.....  
  
"I will be stronger" Vouched the half-demon, leaping from his branch and towards the village. Only did he stop when he smelt the land, of the mass population of humans that had grown within the years he had been gone. Now, quieter, he crept toward the edge of the village. There, a little familiar hut sat. His eyes looked on curiously, it was some what familiar, but he couldn't place it.  
  
Before he even had a chance to take another leap, a girl emerged from the doorway. He froze, staying in his position and watching her cautiously. Out followed behind her a younger girl, carrying out a bundle of arrows. They walked a little ways, before stopping at an old, rotting fence post. The woman pulled out her bow, looking to the little one for her arrows. She would fling one right after the other, on the small marked target. Suddenly, she stopped, again placing the bow behind her and collecting the used arrows.  
  
"Sister?" Then began the little one, following close behind. "Why are you practing so suddenly?"  
  
"Something strong is coming, and I must be ready Kaede." Replied the older one, looking to her lovingly. "But let us get home, so we may prepare ourselves a lunch."  
  
"K!" Replied Kaede, following her older sister with quick steps. "Do you think this strong creature is a strong youkai out to get the shikon no tama?"  
  
"Perhaps."  
  
With that, both entered their home, settling themselves for their midday meal.  
  
The dog boy's ear's twitched again, looking quite serious. "So they are hiding that shikon no tama here, eh?" His eyes narrowed a little. "That simple woman is suppose to keep me from the jewel? Feh, shes only a human." But as he said this, there was a slight edge to his voice, He had watched that 'simple woman' fling those arrows with ease to their target, perfect aim.  
  
"No matter." He growled to himself, leaping off the tree to the forest floor. He would wait, and watch this woman. He would get that jewel, no matter what the cost, and turn to his true form. He would be a youkai, he promised.  
  
Weeks flew by before the hanyou acted. Now, feeling ready he would attack, taking the shikon no tama for himself. Today he watched, from the safety of the tree, waiting for his prey to show herself. As predicted, out she came, walking through the town, and politely bowing to those she passed. After visiting a local home, she made her way to the woods. This was where he had learned she practiced, and picked up flowers and stuff for what, he had no idea. But now, he knew, was time. As quietly as possible he clawed his way down the trunk of the tree he watched her from. Placing his bare feet on the solid grown, he melted back to all fours. Ears back, and teeth bared he made his way forward through the grass, trying his best to stay against the ground.  
  
Meanwhile, Kikyou outstretched her arm, bow in hand, arrow in the other. Her eyes focused, her mouth twitched, but did not smile, there was no joy in attacking. Pulling back, she suddenly turned, eyes now intense. "Present yourself" She deeply announced, not giving away any emotion.  
  
'Damnit!' His eyes narrowed, as slowly he rose to his full height. "Heh, pretty good, for a human." He stubbornly shot back. A deep growl began in his throat.  
  
The woman angled her bow, looking to the mere boy with narrowed eyes. "Is that so?" She said, now in a smaller voice, but one just as powerful. "Why are you following me, hanyou?"  
  
He held his breath, and his heart stopped for that moment. S-She knew?! How?! "Feh, clever of you to notice. However, I still have the advantage." He presented his claws, a sharp fang protruding from his lips. "You have something I desire" He continued calmly in his gruff voice.  
  
Continuing to hold her bow and arrow in position, she answered, "The shikon no tama? So you are hoping to turn yourself full youkai?"  
  
"Ah, you are clever." He began to walk closer. His golden eyes glowed, an illusion of the dimly lit forest. "Are you hoping to strike me, wench?"  
  
Her brown eyes never moved from him, as she pulled back. "If that is what you wish" She whispered, letting the arrow go, flying through the air and to the half-demon.  
  
Easily, InuYasha leaped from harms way, standing on a low branch. "So a battle is what you're looking for?" He grinned a cocky grin. "Fine with me!" With that, he leaped, claws forward, out stretched and towards her.  
  
The woman didn't even flinch, though she wasn't fast, she had anticipated his move. She already had a bow and arrow in hand, and it flung without hesitation. This time it pierced its target, slamming him to a nearby tree. A growl emitted, trying to pull it away.  
  
"Do you not understand, I must protect this jewel." Her frown continued, it seemed almost sad, lonely. But never to his eyes, he was too self-absorbed...  
  
"What do I care what you do!" He yelled back, again trying to release himself what was with this arrow?! Without another thought, he swiped his other clawed hand, tearing off the pierced rat's fur, falling roughly to the forest floor. "Why not just kill me just then? Are you feeling pity for me?! I don't take pity well."  
  
Now the Miko look away, her eyes trailing for her target, unusual for a archer. A hunter. "I purify the jewel." She whispered, eyes flashing dangerously back. "Why is it, you'd like to become something so dangerous, so wicked?"  
  
His own eyes flashed, looking somewhat surprised, but trying his best not to show it. "None of your business."  
  
"I suppose not." Replied Kikyou, then turning and walking away, not even bothering to continue her training and practice. "If that is the way you feel I cannot help you."  
  
InuYasha's eyes widened. "H-Hey!" He said, slightly confused. What the heck was she doing- turning her back on the enemy! Well fine, he would just kill this silly woman and be done with it! Springing forward he ran, claws outstretched, ready to send the death blow--  
  
If only he had made it that far.  
  
Kikyou was now turned, facing the frozen Hanyou. Her eyes were cold, clenching the bow with white knuckles. "Striking me down may give you the jewel, and you may turn to a vicious youkai, but what would it earn you? If you must battle me, let it be on fair grounds." She turned around hastily. "May we meet again, hanyou." With that, she was gone- and InuYasha couldn't do a thing to stop her.  
  
"Damn that woman...." He growled, already planning for revenge.  
  
Sprinting through the forest, an angile archer following in chase. Arrows flew from her bow, as she sled to a halt. Every one she let go hit its target.  
  
There Inuyasha hanged, feet dangling, arrowing holding him from his pants and long sleeves. He watched her again stand ready, with her bow pulled back. He gulped, watching her with uncertainty.  
  
Slowly, Kikyou put down her bow, placing her arrows to her back she turned away. As she did so, she heard InuYasha begin to growl.  
  
"Wait a minute, damnit! Why don't you ever finish me off?!" He called, eyes narrowed with anger.  
  
"Don't be so rash." Kikyou retorted, not setting for any certain emotion. "It's regrettable that you must be pinned down."  
  
Eyes wide, curious, protective, down at the figure, again splashing herself with the freezing water from the bucket. He stood on a nearby high ledge, watching her.  
  
Her clothes stuck to her, and through the white cloth showed flesh. Again another ice cold bucket of water was flung over her shoulder, her raven locks sticking to her skin. Brown eyes were focused, as the waterfall roared beside her.  
  
'I never thought about taking the Shikon no Tama, or killing Kikyou.'  
  
'I could never kill Kikyou.'  
  
In the grassy clearing Kikyou sat, alone. The wind blew lightly, making her hair dance. "InuYasha, you're here, aren't you?" She called out lightly. "Why don't you come on out?"  
  
InuYasha peeked from behind the bush, looking at her questionably. He blinked, watching her for a moment.. wondering what the catch was. But finally he came stalking out from behind on all fours, Sitting down with his knees high in the air. His hands were tucked between his legs as he stared at the Priestess, growling and narrowing his eyes.  
  
Kikyou acknowledged InuYasha, he was so uncomfortable in this atmosphere, him, her, alone... Again, the wind lifted their lengths of hair like a bird in flight. "Sitting and talking with you.... This is the first time, isn't it?"  
  
"What's your point?!" He snapped, not taking his eyes off of her.  
  
Slowly, she lowered her head, turning to look at him, her eyes, her expression strangely looking sad... Why? "Inuyasha.. How do you see me? Do I look like a human?"  
  
"Eh? What are you talking about?" He asked in a cocky voice, automatically turning to her.  
  
A slowness flew through the air, until the wind picked up her soft voice. "I'm not like everyone else.. I cannot hesitate.. or else the youkai will not see me as a threat. Even though I am human, I have never lead a normal human life..."  
  
InuYasha watched, listened.... His shoulders slumped but his expression cold, uncaring, but..  
  
"You and I are the same, since you are a hanyou, and that is why... I cannot kill you..."  
  
"Hmph!" InuYasha snorted, standing "What is this trash?! You never shut up!" He quickly turned away. But.. for some reason, as he was about to walk away.. "Huh?" He turned, looking deep into her sorrowful face...  
  
"Is that so... I don't shut up, do I?"  
  
In the silence they stood there, unable to turn away from eachother's faces. The wind blew, but not even that could make them move from their places.. It was like they had come to an understanding..  
  
'After seeing Kikyou's sad face, for the first time in my life I had lost the will to be mischievous. From then on I thought nothing else but Kikyou.'  
  
'Kikyou was.... always beside me'  
  
'I also, wanted forever to be with Kikyou....'  
  
"Me? Human?"  
  
Again, in a grassy field they sat. InuYasha, sitting in a canine posture, as Kikyou sat with a hand laid back. Her arrows and bow by her side. They stared at eachother, InuYasha giving Kikyou a slightly troubled look.  
  
"It can be done." Kikyou answered confidently. "Since half of you is originally human."  
  
InuYasha looked down, as if in thought.. A.. human..?  
  
"If the Shikon no Tama falls into the hands of a wicked youkai," She continued, "Their power will increase manifold. However, if it is used to turn you into a human... after the Tama purifies you.. they will most likely disappear.." Her voice was quiet as she spoke, as if it were a secret between the two. Her eyes glanced to him, as if to wonder about his difficult desion.  
  
"But then, Kikyou.." Replied the hanyou, uncertainly, "What will happen to you..?" His eyes watched the grass, his expression was of worry.  
  
"If the Tama I've been protecting.. If the Tama disappears.. then I can finally become a normal woman.."  
  
The boat slid through the water, lightly hitting the dock as they reached land. InuYasha held the long guiding stick, as he rose, lifting himself to the wooden ground. Kikyou rose also, slightly leaning forward. Her sandal caught the ledge as she lifted her foot, making her fall forward.. Unable to stop, bow in hand..  
  
Falling into InuYasha's chest..  
  
Her eyes slowly rose to him, her eyes uncertain...  
  
For a moment he stood, not quite sure of how to handle this moment. His fists clenched the rod with uncertainty.  
  
A clank was heard as the pole fell to the floor, leaving only room in his arms for Kikyou...  
  
'Although I didn't care much for her pretty words.. If I could be together with Kikyou, I thought I could become human for her. That is how I wanted to live.'  
  
'However, on that promised day..'  
  
InuYasha's head flung around, just missing the three arrows that zoomed past him, hitting a tree at full speed. That could have been him. As he looked back... He saw her, bow ready and back, eyes focused, focused on him.  
  
"Die, InuYasha!" She said forcefully, pulling back another arrow. Her eyes were full of.... hate..?  
  
'I... I was betrayed!'  
  
His teeth clenched, his eyebrows furrowed... His face covered with confusion..  
  
'After catching me by surprise, Kikyou tried to kill me......'  
  
He stared at her... His own eyes filling with his own kind of hate.. but mostly despair...  
  
'Then, after dodging many of her arrows, I went to the village, and retrieved the Shikon no Tama.'  
  
'And then...'  
  
There he was, with no escape. He knew this as she pulled back.. It him him. Losing the Shikon no Tama from his grasp he flew backwards toward the tree... Slowly he glanced back..  
  
"K-Kagome?!"  
  
InuYasha sat straight up, he was sticky.. sweaty.. He lifted up a clawed hand. "A-A dream..?"  
  
The image of the hand was replaced by a mischievous kitsune, making kissy faces. "Yeah a dream, disappointed?"  
  
InuYasha's eyes narrowed, glaring, daring the little fox youkai to continue....  
  
Which he did. "I bet you were dreaming about Kagome, since you called out her name! Oh, you were doing this-" He turned to him, his arms around himself in an embrace, looking as though her were making out. "And you were doing that-- Naughty! Kagome-"  
  
Before the kitsune could say one more word, a large hand was over his mouth. The other had him up by his tail. "Shippou!" He growled, looking down to see if Kagome was there.... and she was..  
  
Down on the ground was Miroku, giving a thumbs up. "I knew some part of you-" But it was never finished, as a youkai named Shippou was hurled at his face.  
  
Sango smiled at his reaction, her boomerang was already held in the position to strike.  
  
Kagome was flustered to say the least, her cheeks in a light pink. Her shoulders carried the heavy bundle she always carried through the well. "ShippouChan!" She scolded with her uneasy voice. "Stop teasing InuYasha- as for you-" Her brown eyes shot up at the dog demon. "Either we start hunting for the shards NOW, or I go back home!"  
  
InuYasha shook his head before jumping down to their level. A teasing grin began to play on his face. A finger extended. "Oh? And whats this blush on your-"  
  
"SIT!!!!!"  
  
By an unnamed forced, the half-youkai was pulled down to the ground, unable to move. "Fuck! Kagome, why did you have to-"  
  
"You can catch up to us!" The raven haired girl said now without another thought. Turning on her heels, and moving along friends, they were on their way..  
  
All except InuYasha who was stuck to the ground...  
  
But all of this was so familiar now... Not every aspect did he like of it, but it was familiar nevertheless. As he could lift his body from the dirt road, a small smile touched his lips.  
  
This is the life he liked. No other way would make it normal, it was the way it had to be...  
  
He watched them until they turned into a speck on the road. No need for rushing, he could catch up to them in a second anyway. His eyes then watched, curious, protective... on her.  
  
'Will this happiness last? Or end like the rest.. eventually...'  
  
As the warm air blew, it started a new day, a new day for hunting Shikon shards... Maybe it will be today..?  
  
I WANT TO CHANGE THE WORLD  
  
I won't show anymore weakness  
  
To find a future with you I can fly anywhere  
  
CHANGE MY MIND without losing my passion  
  
I will spread my wings toward the unknown tomorrow  
  
I should be able to fly IT'S WONDERLAND  
  
Author's Note:  
  
O.x* That was a LONG fic for me to write.... And I had most of the end planned before the beginning. In fact, during the writing of this fic I changed the beginning... twice. Actually, I think more of adding on. And before I get email saying "You copied off the show! That already happened!" YES I KNOW! LoL, I have the tapes and I am fully aware! However, to make the story flow (and seem more believable ^^*) I added this. It's about his past right? RIGHT?! And I don't know which fansubb I used... so.. O.o*** Man, its nearly four thirty in the morning too.....  
  
Oh, and I used the second half of the opening song simply because I think it fitted this fic much better.  
  
Yes, I am pro Kagome/InuYasha.  
  
Also, the sword Shessy used was not the sword that gave life- err- I wrote this story before I knew of it ^^* We can pretend... right? Sorry!  
  
And this is my first InuYasha fiction attempt ^^* Be gentle....  
  
Oh! My AIM SN is ChibiAiChan! I like to talk ^^*** Be warned!  
  
Many Thanks to my sister and friends!! Without them this fic would not have been accomplished- I would have given up many moons ago!  
  
And thank you TailweaverSensei for writing "The White Dog" It was a BIG inspiration! Without reading that fic, this one would never been made! ^^  
  
All in All, I hope everyone enjoyed-- and if you did, please, I would appreciate it if you let me know...  
  
11/25/01 This fic was completed. 


End file.
